Dear Readers,

Weddings and funerals make some people cry; but I cry at graduations. To me, this is a perfect time for reflections and introspections. Graduations are the closest parallel to the Christian race. You walk the road of studying and producing and when the end finally comes, you are rewarded accordingly for your devotion and stewardship. Those who sew sparingly will reap sparingly; those who sew abundantly will be rewarded as such. What a wonderful concept.

In a few short days, the streets will be flooded with young people who would have completed their final hours of primary and high school education. For some who would have prepared, the next leg of this journey is a cake- walk. For others who failed to plan for this transition, the following years may present a challenge.

As we appreciate and assess our children, it is vital to note that each child must be judged on his merit. We know that there are some traits, namely intelligence and creativity that have an inherent base. However, we must not ignore the role that environment plays in learning. Some children apply themselves more than others, sometimes with the assistance of adults, other times, without. Conversely, there are children who are categorized with disorders that may lend to a slower academic outcome. These include mental retardation, learning disabilities, autism, communication disorders or some other disorder with a physiological base.

The important thing is to celebrate our children, especially when we know that they have done their best. As parents, we can advocate for structured program/curriculum designs for our children who are not as inclined as others. This is important to the healthy growth and development of each child. Since career exploration examines a child's interests, aptitude and ability, we can assure that all opportunities are available to our children, particularly subjects in the technical and vocational fields.

It is quite normal for parents to want their children to pursue the careers that are perceived to have more status, inadvertently placing undue pressure on children. Occasionally, we aspire to live our unfilled lives through our children. Remember, lawyers, doctors and engineers need carpenters and welders too.

Contractors, lawn care specialists, sanitation, janitorial, plumbers and clerical workers are essential for the survival of mankind. Even though money should not be the only driving force behind doing anything, many of these skilled professionals earn pretty decent incomes.

So, as our children transition from one stage of life to the other, let us ensure that they, with our assistance, make the best plans for their lives and future. It is not about us. It is about the children. This includes appropriate activities for the summer months during the extended stay at home.

Congratulations to all our graduates!! May God bless and keep you as you explore the possibilities for your lives.

Point to ponder: "Children, like shoes, come in all shapes, colours, designs and sizes. As parents, we should guide them in choosing the best accessories to compliment their outfits."

Dr. Pam

Ask Doctor Pam is an advice column that is featured every Saturday in this journal. Your letters and comments are encouraged. You may email your letters or comments to askdoctorpam@yahoo.com, or write to Askdoctorpam P.O. Box F43736. Dr. Pam is a Clinical Psychologist trained in all areas of mental health.